Hello you beautiful people!
I know it’s been long, I have almost vanished after my last blog that was about my health, titled ‘How is Aditi doing?‘.
After which, alot has occured but I am happy that I am finally writing to let you know all about the happenings in my life since then.
I remember an incident from 3 years ago, when I went to see a doctor who had practised in the U.S and was then working as a Senior Rheumatologist in Vijayawada, a city in the present Andhra Pradesh.
It had only been a year since Fibromyalgia entered in my life, and after listening to all the symptoms that I was suffering from, the doctor had put his palm on his forehead and with a tone of disappointment said, “Aditi, there will soon be a point in your life when you will have to crawl on the ground to get things done.”
I couldn’t believe him, left his office at once thinking how pessimistic he is for a doctor.
Fast forward 3 years to this day, I am experiencing something very similar to what that doctor had told me.
Those who follow me (Calm Insights) on social media handles, would know that last week, I was in Bangalore for my follow-up at NIMHANS!
I was there earlier than expected because the medicine that they were trying on me had caused drastic weight gain and worsening of symptoms.
After about a couple hours of brainstorming by few of the best doctors in India, they came to a conclusion that medical science doesn’t have anything else to help me in the pain and that nothing from allopathy can help me ever!
It was disheartening and seemed to have broken me from inside the moment I heard them.
Upon further letting them know that even alternative treatments like body massages, acupuncture etc. have failed to show any sign of relief, they asked me to undergo behavioural therapy from a good therapist in Hyderabad, for a very long time.
Again, one therapy session costs around 2k and considering even twice a week minimum, it will cost me around 2 lacs a year.
My inability to do any kind of physical exercise like yoga, walking, running or stretching adds to the misery.
I am completely devastated right now.
Other than career, friends, family, happiness, peace of mind, physical ability it has stolen so many other things as well from my life.
For Instance my inability to walk and hundreds of medicines that I have been tried upon has caused this;
The above photo is me prior to having Fibromyalgia in August, 2014.
And below is the present me;
That’s just the unwanted weight gain.
My older life and present life are poles apart in terms of struggle, tears, hopes, failure and everything else that I have been robbed of.
My present state of health is that I am unable to sit or stand for more than 5 minutes.
Headache and body feels like have been run over by a truck 24*7.
There is no day when the pain allows me to sleep regularly, even if I sleep finally, it wakes me up multiple times like a nightmare.
My near and dear ones, haven’t experienced this and hence every once in a while they keep posing the question, that “you look alright, why don’t you stop being lazy and start working?’
I wish I could make each one of you understand how, having Fibromyalgia is worse than having a limb broken or having cancer or migraine or knee pain or anything that you have ever experienced.
National Fibromyalgia association describes fatigue in fibro as if the person has just ran over 8 kms at a stretch.
It has also been proved that after having ran for more than 8 kms at a stretch, the amount of lactic acid that is found in a normal person is found in a Fibromyalgia patient all the time.
All this technology, advancement and yet there is so little understanding of the world’s most cruel disease ever.
I will keep trying as long as I live, I am going to try Ayurveda and Homeopathy for a much longer time than I tried them last time for, I will never give up no matter what because I believe;
“God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers”
And I also believe;
“Higher the intensity of your problem, more you learn from it and wiser you become”.
I will soon write about why I turned vegetarian out of my own will, until then bless me and contribute for my treatment as much as you can through the ‘Buy me a coffee button’ on the same page.
Take care you beautiful people.
Love and Regards