“I only know that people call me a feminist, whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat”
~ Rebecca West
Life is a blessing isn’t it? A world that goes on spinning right on, no matter what I or you are going through at the moment!
It gives me a calm feeling to know that while we are gazing at the night sky, the beautiful cluster of shiny twinkling stars in the backdrop of nothingness;
We aren’t looking at the stars itself but the sheer light emitted from them tens, hundreds or thousands of years ago. In reality, what we are looking at, is past.
It’s liberating similarly to know that however calm, still and beautiful the cottony clouds seem on the vast blue sky, the speed of wind inside any given cloud is atleast 15 km/hr.
Though ofcourse it’s just a random piece of information, but a gorgeous one at that and beautiful things ought to be shared! 🤗
Among 4 sisters and one little brother, I was fourth in line, born to a modest, hard working couple, in a small town of Eastern U.P .
In most parts of our country, a girl was raised in a different manner than boys. While boys were given all the freedom in the world to set foot out there and pursue whatever they wanted to, girls on the other hand, were taught to always keep their legs together, speak in low voices, never aspire more than getting married, keeping her husband and in laws happy, bearing children and tending to them until the day she dies.
Basically, any respectable girl was supposed to be a maid not just to her in laws and husband, but quite surprisingly to her children as well.
Thankfully my parents never knew this or if they did, they never let us know. We were taught in the best schools, given chance to pursue our varied interests in art, science, dance, literature, photography or whatever it was that we wanted to do.
All they made sure was that we learnt and there were no obstacles in our paths.
Today, all my sisters are doing wonderfully where they are.
One is an artist, another a national player.
One never liked the sight of books, another lives inside books more than anywhere else.
One a business analyst, another learning performing arts and visual communication.
One who aspired to be a scientist another, found it a Herculean task to get her way around algebra and Newton’s laws.
One who couldn’t care less about physical beauty, another giving tutorials on it.
And you know what, we were all loved the way we were and the folks, encouraged us to be us.
They let us be.
Today, we are all financially independent.
Paying our bills, doing what we want, being who we are and living our lives unapologetically.
But, the world outside my home is altogether a different story.
The internet today is full of posts and videos and discussions on ‘fake-feminism’, than anything else. Every time I open my browser, I see atleast one person trolling women who are ‘misusing’ feminism for their own benefits.
I see my male friends casually talking about it too. I see women silently listening and nodding and sometimes agreeing that such a thing exists, just to be able to fit in.
Everytime I see this happening, I feel my muscles tensed, I feel the urge to tell them that this is not what feminism is. To tell them that feminism simply means equality.
‘Misuse of Feminism’ is a term more common than anything else and yet its nothing more than a misnomer.
Misuse of equality is possible, no more than misusing one’s ticket to Disneyland.
Men discuss whether feminism is a good idea or a bad as if they are the law makers and women are their sub-ordinates, where they can still choose to what extent can women be allowed to live!
Women have been deprived of equality for centuries, so much so that some still find it hard to believe that a world afterall is possible where we are allowed to be as free as our counterparts have always been.
“Why Aditi, you sound like a feminist?”
I have been asked as if it’s a disgusting thing and as if the moment I let them know, I have already lost the argument.
Feminism, we need to understand is not just for the upliftment of women, but men too, freeing them from the long established pressure of patriarchy.
Where a man and a woman can stand shoulder to shoulder and share a piece of their mind fearlessly.
Where a woman can support a man, as much as a man can support her.
Where in bed, a woman reaching climax is as important as a man’s is.
Where a woman is everything that she wants to be, a prostitute, a lawyer, a full time mother, a digital nomad, a monk or a CEO;
Where the choice is hers!
Where the world is just and where people matter, both men and women equally.
While I am writing this, my brother who is the youngest of us all, who studied in a boarding school since he was twelve years old and is studying business, called me and asked what I was doing.
I told him I was writing a blog on feminism.
“Feminism or Fake- feminism?”, he asked.
“There is nothing called Fake-feminism, how can you misuse equality?” I asked him.
“Some women go and misuse the opportunities given to them”, he replied.
“And are there no men who misuse the opportunities? Are all men right? Do they not go wrong too?”
The line on the other side disconnected and I understood that he was contemplating, I understood that he is taking his time to absorb the realisation, that we are all just people, likely to go both right and wrong.
We all need to support equality, and people we all need to create a world where our sons and daughters, our sisters and brothers, our spouses have the power of choice.
We all need to be feminists!
Strength and Love 💙
I would love to know how you feel in the comments section down below.
Share the post if you liked it, you can also go ahead and buy me a coffee through the yellow button down below to support what I do.
Also if you are a reader, I recommend a book called The Color Purple by Alice Walker that beautifully portrays a story of patriarchial society where a girl who goes through abuse all her life is the narator. The book is in the form of letters to God, ofcourse because there was no one to listen to her.
If you are gonna read it, do let me know how you feel after reading.
Have a beautiful Sunday people! 💕